The breakup effect

Breakups are almost inevitable… unless you’re lucky enough to find your match from the first go. Having so many (girl)friends I’ve been able to see clear differences between them and how they handle situations – in particular breakups. Women go through different phases after a breakup, some that may be oblivious to men.

These are just general observations I’ve made from friends and through hear say.

The emotional eater

A lot of women begin to comfort eat after a break up, I can’t offer you an elaborate scientific reason behind it but here’s my logic;

  • Breakups connote failure and nobody likes to fail. Breakups are undoubtedly more painful if you’re the one who’s dumped. It can leave you feeling like the most insecure female in the world; as though you’re unworthy of happiness so in turn you binge because it’s easy to do.
  • Boredom; once you separate yourself from someone you find all this extra time you never had and suddenly you find yourself eating a big packet of Doritos in front of the TV.
  • Ever feel really happy after eating chocolate? Yeah? That’s because chocolate releases endorphins (happy hormones) so if it makes us feel better than it’s all were going to crave. After breakups were looking for a glimmer of happiness and if we find it in food then it becomes our saving grace.

I know what it’s like; I’ve comfort eaten so many times with my two special boys Ben & Jerry.

Ladies take note those are the only men that will be there for us through whatever and love us no matter what. Invest ASAP.

Not hungry

Your appetite will change as a result of a breakup. Fact. However you might not comfort eat you might lose your appetite. Usually it may just be a phase but it happens. I can’t tell you it’s wrong because it would make me a hypocrite but it gives him the power. Surely regardless of who dumped who, you would want to show him how happy you are without him. He should never be given the satisfaction of knowing how miserable he may have made you. If anything you owe it to yourself to focus and motivate yourself to try out different things.

The motivator

Many will become their own motivators after breakups. They channel their emotions onto different things like exercise and other hobbies. I see it as bettering yourself for future relationships both physically and emotionally. Finding happiness in joys like music and blogging (in my case) is indescribable. You earn so much more respect when you take control of your life, rather than having someone control you. There comes a point where you have to push the pain to one side and start looking forward.

The social media stalker

This can work in two ways; we either have a friend who stalks her ex after a breakup or you’re reading this and thinking shit I should probably get off *insert name* Facebook profile.h39172A46

We live in a generation that is utterly addicted to social media; allowing people’s lives to be accessible. It’s almost deemed as acceptable to stalk your ex by looking through his Facebook, Twitter, and old photos, just so you can still feel connected with him. The more you cling onto someone the harder it is to move on and what happens if you see something that upsets you. What could even be potentially worse is skimming through his profile and accidently liking someone – then you’ve blown your cover. Just try your hardest to avoid because if you’re like me then you’ll read into every little detail and start to drive yourself mad.

To all the good friends in the world, if you know someone that sums up my description then SAVE HER before she gets hurt.

The quick movers

We have to be careful when talking about quick movers because there are two sub headings under the category.

The actual quick movers

I don’t know how they do it but there are actual girls that move on after a space of a week.  I know a few girls like this, who are willing to start hooking up with other guys on your next girl’s night out and although it’s an inconvenience for me seeing as its GIRLS NIGHT OUT, I still think good for them.

I think a lot of people can have opinions about this kind of group, maybe assuming these girls are just ‘easy’ when truthfully we had no idea about the circumstances. Plus who are we to judge anyway

The fake quick movers

This is the one girl that just refuses to talk about how she’s feeling and instead pretends like nothing happened. I think in theory it would be ideal if we could all just get over it but break ups are painful for a reason. The girls that pretend to move on quickly are the ones most likely to have a meltdown a month down the line. If you’re like this then you should know its ok to be a mess, more than ok actually, since really the only thing that helps is time and moving forward.

As you can see breakups can affect us in a range of ways. We can all offer each other advice and support but nobody can tell you how you’re going to react. So instead look out for each and flip those two fingers at the douche bags.

@nattigomez94 & @NatsNatter

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